Silent Night

As the world enters slumber land, here I am, awake.
Haunted by the past, the present and the future.
Haunted, by the fact of my mere existence.

The beauty of life...never did appear to me.

Or perhaps it did. In bringing to me, people who I wanted to protect.

Yet, I am the one in need of protecting.
But no one will protect me.
Forever, all over again, I'm drowning in my own despairs.
Drowning in myself.

The pain, has resurfaced.
The hatred, of the distrust, has resurfaced.
The need, to revert back, beckons.

But if I were to revert back, I would lose, who I am to you.
And you, who I proved to be so precious to me, should never see the other side of me.
The side, where only the darkest of all would see.

I want you, to live in eternal bliss.
And want myself to acheive that too.
But after a while, I guess I will have to be contented.

In being who I shouldn't be. And a hateful person.
Who, will never ever trust anyone again.

Because all promises are empty promises.